rebelling into the fear of God...

I guess you can say that I am in a bit of a rebellious phase in my life.  Truth be told a real rebel wouldn't outright say that.  So maybe I'm not.  Anyway, I guess there is holy anger within.  A burning passion.  An intense flame that is burning in my soul.  It is physical.  Its burning right now.  Its burning through my heart and out of my chest.  I would draw it for you but alas the passion to get this message across is more intense, so let me do this rather.  Maybe a pic later.  Back to the thought about being a rebel.  There are generalisations of what is good and what is bad.  For example tattoo's are spelt close to the word taboo for a reason ;) (sarcasm kicked in there).  But seriously there are certain things that are considered taboo and these very things are not condemned by God.  At times man can think in two colours : black and white.  There are so many other shades out there too.  God adds the colour of understanding and wisdom to the pallet of paints.  And no I'm not just about to sell you the book, '50 shades of grey'.  What I would suggest to people who easily give judgement (black or white) to first put themselves in the other person's shoes.  Not even God Himself casts judgement on men.  I guess we can then deduce that we place ourselves in a higher position than the Almighty when we judge others.  

Each person has a conscience.  A mind in which God talks and prods and suggests.  Each person has the choice and freedom to choose to the 'angel sitting on their shoulder' or not.  I'm not saying that we should never speak truth into a friends situation (cos they have a conscience) but one should hold back judgement.  We should offer others freedom to listen to their internal radio rather than give them the cheap and easy answers.  Condemnation, judgement, accusations and criticism will distance you from other people if you choose to indulge in it.  It may seem tempting but I assure you it is sinking sand.  You thought you had a strong stand point until you start sinking too.  

Back to this burning in my heart.  I have a burning in my heart to follow God intensely more than to follow the opinions of others.  One of my greatest tragedies is when I have compromised my own beliefs for someone else's and then it blows up in my face.  God gives us a gut feel that we ought to go with.  He is that still and intense whisper in y/our ear.   

I am immensely rebellious in going against the grain (status quo)- if that is what it means.  I am immensely and intensely passionate about going Gods way.  I am happy to say that when I make decisions  I think about my motives.  I think to myself: why am I doing this?  Why am I wanting to spend time with this or that person? Sometimes I do things to look good and to look good in the eyes of others.  At times I am shallow and then I surrender my heart again to God.  

There is a flame within that burns brightly.  It burns so deep within.  It burns away all the selfish motives that I find within.  It burns away my need to please others.  It burns away my fear of man and illuminates my fear of God.

I encourage you to fear God more than you fear man.  

I encourage you to consult God when making decisions.

I encourage you to hold your tongue and put yourself in others shoes.

I encourage you to love.

to love God.

to love yourself.

Love

fearful Sarah