Now now dear child...

Today sitting in the shade with some of the children the girls start modeling around me.  We have an informal modeling show and then one of the children asks me to stand up and sing a song. I stand up tall! Open my chest up. Breathe and um... well I forget the words of the song we learnt in choir (Burn by Ellie Goulding). Then the next song that comes to mind is "He has the whole world in His hands... ". 

I write this in weakness not in strength...

My first term as a teacher is ending and so is my physical strength...

Losing myself in the process of starting what I deem a calling: teaching.  Entering into it through a veil of tears merely watching my selfish ambitions cascade down my cheeks.  Losing myself and yet finding more of Him.  Let me divulge ...  everytime I see a childs hatred and anger dissolve into warmth and forgiveness my hearts ambitions melt away within seconds.  I see the face of God in the mornings as I pull up to school and my children run across the road to help me carry my bags, when a "defiant" boy comes to hold my hand... When a child talks daily and constantly about their worship experience... When a child just wants to linger in my presence...   

As I have given up my cause for a greater one I plain and simply see the greater cause.  I am supposed to be the teacher and yet I am so the learner.  I am supposed to be an adult and get I find myself a child... passionately pursuing knowlege, desiring to play and explore the world and eager to love and embrace all around me.  This is the end but its so the begining.  This is me taking up responsibility as an adult to be childlike (thats what my Father desires surely?). 

now we are talking plus sizes...

I was so disapointed with Calvin Klein's plus model when she appeared because...um... *clear my throat* she wasn't actually a plus size model. Click here for more.  So much for giving the starving anorexics some leeway. 

Now we're talking.  Enter Ashley Graham.  Advocating being happy whether you are classed big or small by society check her out here and here about what she says about weight.

falling in love...

Recently I have decided that I don't like the idea of falling in love... In fact I am wholly jolly well darn scared out of my socks of this idea.  This doesn't mean I haven't thought about it.  The in's and out's, the pro's and con's and of coarse the risk...

Firstly I don't like the idea of falling in love because who actually likes the act of physically falling? So who would like the act of emotionally falling?  This means being out of control-no thank you! I'll pass.  Sounds a lot like risk.  Falling alludes to losing your dignity.  Going with gravity and without much mental comprehension or self control.  Sounds a lot like something that happens when you're not being careful. 

In my experience not being careful leads to a sore head, heart or ass.  But I mean who out there doesn't want to be loved? Surely everyone does and so we take the risk, we risk losing our dignity, we overcome our fear of perhaps looking ridiculous.  I would like to offer an alternative to those who still find the idea of 'falling in love' too risky.  On the menu I would like to offer you the option of finding yourself in love.  This does not mean that you end up the lonely cat lady but instead you find yourself attracting the same lovely kind of people like yourself.  You make loving (long term minded) decision after another to include and allow other loving people into your life and look what you have... your best friend now becomes your lover.  This option is low in calories (not so many binge break-ups), high in carbs (solid substance) and meaty conversation.  All jokes aside it seems a lot like a less irrational approach and high in rewards and satisfaction.

However if this still doesn't ease your fear and or pain try this article out.

lots of love,
hopeful romantic
Sarah xxx

for a sweet read...

a sweet read about falling in love with yourself.  I truly believe that in order to love we need to know that we are loved.  Before we can give love we need to recieve love.  Sounds logical right?  Much like a bank account can't make a withdrawl if there hasn't been a deposit.

Some ideas of how to fall in love with yourself. 
Many of which I already practice!

Hope it inspires you :)

Disney's princesses...

For an interesting read regarding realistic and unrealistic expectations that Disney movies could sub consciously be instilling in darling little girls click here. 

Love,
Sarah.

He desires me...

I did warn you that I might skip a few letters of the alphabet... After all this is not a grade R lesson is you are a South African or a 2 year old American ;)

Regardless... I decided to skip to the letter G.  Then I'll go to the next letter H and end this alphabet blog post with S.  So I have gone somewhat consequentially but also NOT. 

I desire God-Father God.
I desire Holy Spirit.  Holy Ghost.  Person.
I desire Son, Jesus.  Not in a cussing cursing way but the real Jesus.  The one who deserves honour, respect, glory. 

3 in one.  They are one yet have different functions.  They work together.  They are a person.  Someone.
I desire someone.
I desire Him.
I desire all three in one sitting.

and He desires me.
He desires you.
You are His desire.
He desires to give you the desires of your heart.
You are desirable. 

i desire...

I desire c...

colourful counterparts. Curious cats. Christmas cards in casual cases. Contact. Contentment. Contested conversing. Connections. Conversation with Christ. Community. Calls. Coffee in the city centre. Coffee in the country. Countless clouds to chill on. A childlike companion. A champion chat. Character filled company. A complete confident and clear cut calling. A Calligraphy corner. A coin collection. To attend a college in clothing. To be covered and crowned in creative clothing. To be clogged with clarity. To be confused and confirmed in certainty. To be collected and called. To be cool, calm and collectively crazy. To be crashed with clashing classes. To be classified as classic and classy. To be creative in a creation of a classroom. To be the cream of the crop. To leave a comment for the centuries to come. To compel classes to care. To carefully craft common careers for commaners. To change and create. To comuinicate. To celebrate churched and comuinities. To comfort children. To counteract calousness. To come crawling back into church. To consider consistency. To continue to charge calling out change. To check calamities. To call citizens to catch and carry the call. To colour the canvas with a composition of clear course not for cash but change. To change chicken to chuck collections of "I can't" but correct them with I can. To collaborate and come together collectively. To care. To cancel casualties. To cast and catch. To find the crew and allow them to creap into my heart. To carry hearts more closely than cashmere. To clean church. To capture. To complete. To close the can of creapers. To give credit and comment where credits due. To crush cants. To crack open the canteen of contemporary culture. To culminate the course. To create creations commercially. To commit. To commit to commemorate celebrations and celebrating children. To care continually. To constitute constructions. Not to constrict change. To take a chance.